My eyes flipped open as my mind transitioned from one reality to another. My neck was sweaty and my heart racing, but then there was rarely any morning now when this wasn't the case.
I saw her tonight. I saw her in a room, teary eyed. Her face had gone red, like it always did when she was upset or angry. I had asked her what was wrong but she wouldn't answer. There was a black cat strolling outside the door. It wasn't the first time I was seeing her in my dreams.
I miss her a lot sometimes. I may have moved on long ago, but things like these said otherwise, like deep down somewhere, something still needed healing.
There was a time when we did everything together, knew everything about each other. We were crazy around each other. Now I've missed a large part of her life. She's grown very beautiful and strong. She always was the stronger one. I was the insecure one.
What broke it was a misunderstanding, but it doesn't change the fact that I left. Like I always did when I saw a threat or competition. I tried to make up for it many times. I craved for this to resolve, but it always felt like she was long gone. I almost felt her hurt and hate every time I looked at her or crossed paths. And then I would back off. Maybe I haven't forgiven myself for what happened.
She's one of the most beautiful things that happened in my life. I knew the most fabulous friendship with her, the kind I'd always wanted.
'May the odds be ever in your favour'